Dreams are like wishes without hope. Hope is what keeps
dreams steady, unmovable by the wind. Dreams rooted in hope understand that God
is who holds it all and makes all things true.
Not like a genie in a bottle, but a Father who gives good gifts to His
children, even when they don’t deserve it.
It was written on almost every card and trinket gift I
received when I graduated high school.
For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans
to prosper you and not harm you, to give you a hope and a future. Jeremiah
29:11
God does have plans for us. In Him we do have hope and will
most definitely have a future, but that does not mean all of our dreams will
come true. That is the hard part. All my dreams have not come true and they
definitely did not come true by 20.
What I did receive I was not happy with, because it was not
the whole pretty picture I had created in my mind and it hurt. Over a year
after my Nana died I was diagnosed with a birth defect that was going to
require major surgery. I found myself moving out of the dorms again and back
home I went. Summer of my 20th year I experienced the pain of the
second most painful surgery in the world. By the age of twenty I lost both my
dad’s parents, moved in and out of two colleges, lost friends, was rejected by the church, and had life changing
surgery.
I was emotionally, spiritually, and physically spent.
I made up my mind that dreams are not worth pursuing. Hope deferred makes the heart sick and I was content with the idea of staying
sick, because if I could not have it all I did not want to root my dreams in
hope. I could not go through this kind of emotional pain again. I did not want
to feel letdown by God, because I knew He
hadn’t let me down, but the sting lingered
in my heart.
If God was a giver of good gifts, then why did He allow my
Nana to die?
How is experiencing pain good?
If dreams lead to heartbreak, why
do I need/ should I dream?
Question: What dream did you not get, and what did you receive
instead?
- Hannah
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